02:00 pm
19 October 2017

RadioWest’s Doug Fabrizio Did Not Throw Heavy Object Through Wide-paned Window After Interview With LDS Rep Ally Isom

RadioWest’s Doug Fabrizio Did Not Throw Heavy Object Through Wide-paned Window After Interview With LDS Rep Ally Isom
Ally Isom and Doug Fabrizio conversed on the radio... wait, why, when neither has the expected "face that belongs on the radio?"

RadioWest’s Doug Fabrizio interviewed LDS PR pawn representative Ally Isom on Tuesday and afterward did not throw a heavy object through a wide-paned window.

Ally Isom and Doug Fabrizio conversed on the radio... wait, why, when neither has the expected "face that belongs on the radio?"

Ally Isom and Doug Fabrizio conversed on the radio… wait, why, when neither has the expected “face that belongs on the radio?”

The hour-long segment served as the second part of the program’s conversation on discipline and excommunication in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and the host was also said not to have pulled out any of his Jon Stewart-ish hair, and did not strike a single punching bag even when Isom strung together words such as, “excommunication is not exclusion, but rather inclusion.”

Fabrizio then avoided compromising expensive audio equipment after he asked, “Where does it say in Mormon doctrine that women cannot have the priesthood?” to which Isom inelegantly replied, “It doesn’t.” A few commercial breaks were taken so that listeners’ jaws agape could slowly shut and to perhaps prevent Fabrizio from going Tonya-Harding-ballistic on indoor potted plants.

Although she has only been in her current position for a mere 6 months, Isom honed her defense of the LDS Church as the former deputy chief of staff and spokeswoman for Gov. Gary Herbert.

Isom’s bureaucratic evasions, denials, and deferrings are rumored to have sparked an interest in Terry Gilliam to make a sequel to his 1985 film ‘Brazil.’

Requests for comment from the church on why managing director of Public Affairs Michael Otterson or a member of the Quorum of 12 Apostles did not field the questions remained unanswered, unless they are “not prepared to answer that question,” so to speak.

Isom was then witnessed in the parking lot reporting her numbers to her PR leaders immediately afterward, and was heard to make the claim that “Fabrizio is almost ready to be moved into ‘gator status” so she is “stoked for that.”

3 comments

  • Isom reported that she found 1847 new blogs that posted comments to Dougs show that she turned over to Strengthening the Families Committee, and will be added to the Proclamation of the Family for further light and knowledge.

    Reply
    • “Gator” refers to investigator, meaning someone who is investigating the Church. For example, when a missionary comes into his/her new area, he/she should be able to look through a binder kept by the previous missionaries that lists the people who are taking the missionary discussions.

      Reply

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