02:18 pm
20 November 2017

Annoying Peacemaker Ruins Good Argument

Annoying Peacemaker Ruins Good Argument

OGDEN — A resident Ghandi has once again ruined a spirited debate during an evening among friends this past week. Reports are saying this is not the first time the peacemonger has spread his message of reason to bring an end to an enjoyable fracas of words.

“Maybe everyone has a good point,” the placater said, extending the olive branch and killing the fun. “In a conversation like this, it’s important to be mindful of all perspectives and what each person brings to the overall conversation.”

The would-be Buddha then proceeded to calmly suggest that each party Google search for a confirming answer and/or evidence one way or another on each side of the argument at a later time so that tension could be quelled and everyone could resume having “a good, fun and wholesome evening.”

“He’s always ruining a good row,” Steven Jacobs, friend of the pacifist, said. “Oftentimes just when the bickering is getting good, he steps in uninvited and brings that annoying rationality of his to stifle the fun. What a bore.”

When reached for comment, the soporific Neville Chamberlain of our day stated—in characteristic tediousness—that he thinks all viewpoints have validity and that if we simply reign in our emotion we can more clearly see where one another is coming from.

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