Author Archives

Snorri Sturluson

"I love poetry and lore. I dabble in law and politics, but mostly for the stories."

God Has Awkward Encounter With Both Men He Endorsed For President

CEDAR RAPIDS, IOWA : Christ Deluxe Megachurch was the scene for an encounter straight out of television as God The Father, best known for creating the universe, bumped into neurosurgeon Ben Carson and Texas Sen. Ted Cruz—who had each been…

Mormon Extremists Declare Deseret Caliphate In Oregon

Featured Posts | by Snorri Sturluson

Utah natives and Mormon extremists Ammon and Ryan Bundy seized control of the Malheur National Wildlife Refuge visitor’s center on Saturday and wasted no time declaring the building as headquarters of a new Deseret Caliphate. “We’re here to stay,” said…

Darth Vader, Who Is Dead, Baptized

Featured Posts | by Snorri Sturluson

In a solemn ceremony performed at the Salt Lake City Temple on Monday, 12-year-old Kyle Whiteler was baptized by proxy for and on behalf of Anakin Skywalker, who is dead. “I feel good knowing that whatever sins he committed during…

Refugees Relieved As Flyover States Refuse Them

Featured Posts | by Snorri Sturluson

As news proliferates that more than half of all state governors—despite no legal justification—have announced they are unwilling to welcome Syrian refugees into their state, the refugees themselves are delighted to know they are avoiding the flyover states in the…

Gary R. Herbert Unanimously Confirmed As Prophet, Seer And Governor

Featured Posts | by Snorri Sturluson

His Seership—the divinely inspired gubernatorial voice of holiness, Gary Richard Herbert—was formerly sworn in as prophet, seer, and governor, with all members manifesting their approval. “All in favor please manifest it by the uplifted hand; all opposed please manifest it,”…