Author Archives

Timothy McFoster

Don't show off yer ear till you have one. "If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about answers" – Thomas Pynchon

http://www.bookbreaths.com

Local Nonprofit ‘NonProphet’ Pushes For Wife of Gordon B. Hinckley on $20 Bill

Featured Posts | by Timothy McFoster

As US Treasury Secretary Jack Lew prepares his announcement that a woman will replace imperialist dolt Andrew Jackson on the $20 bill, a local nonprofit, ‘NonProphet,’ is making a last-minute push for the late Gordon B. Hinckley’s wife to…

Gov. Herbert Signs Bill Forcing Doctors To Ask A Fetus If They Prefer Breastfed Milk Or Formula

Featured Posts | by Timothy McFoster

Gov. Gary Herbert just signed a law that will require doctors to ignore best medical practice and ask a fetus whether they prefer breastfed milk or formula. This appears to be the second step—after mandating that women be given unnecessary…

BusTED: Utahns For Cruz: “We’ve Loved Covered-Up Sex Scandals Since The 1830s”

Featured Posts | by Timothy McFoster

Utah’s desired GOP nominee, Sen. Ted ‘the Zodiac Killer’ Cruz, nearly found himself in hot water when the National Enquirer released a story purporting evidence that he cheaTED on his wife with as many as five women. Most Utahn Cruz…

Salivating Utahns Urge Romney To Create New Beehive Party

Featured Posts | by Timothy McFoster

After former presidential nominee darling Mitt Romney addressed the state of the 2016 election, Utahns salivated on the prospect of Mitt Romney starting a new political party: The Beehive Party. “I agree with everything he said about that phony fraud…