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Conference Fans Increasingly Worried that Conference is Almost Over Already

Salt Lake City- As this year’s historic, 184th Annual General Conference wears on, many members of the faith find themselves with an increasing sense of dread, as at some point, the twice yearly miracle must always end. “It’s like it…

Pres. Boyd K. Packer: The Prophet Ought To Live Life To The Fullest

News | by Timothy McFoster

Pres. Boyd K. Packer of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles displayed a chipper tone throughout his imperative remarks at the 183rd Semiannual General Conference of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. He advised that the “Living Prophet…

Dead Mormons Surprised to Find Selves in Same Kingdom As Awful Mormons

Utah vs. BYU: Holy ***

Sports | by Timothy McFoster

Tonight the BYU Cougars host the Utah Utes in Lavell Edwards Stadium — the erroneously named “Rivalry Week” due to its non-Novemberness — in what is shaping up to be quite a battle on both the grid- and the Facebookiron.…

Utah Football Players Exhorted by BYU Fans To Be Immediately Immersed in Water in Response To Abhorrent Immersed in Water Incident

Sports | by Timothy McFoster

Rivalry week activated the modestly-covered thin skin of BYU fans after a video surfaced of University of Utah football players immersing one another into contained areas of water. BYU fans ignited with righteous indignation and demanded the players repent of…